Uma direcção. As horas a passar. O nascer-do-sol. Uma árvore frondosa. Um sorriso espontâneo. Uma janela aberta para ver o mundo girar.
Não só ver. Participar. Contribuir. Girar com ele. Porque o mundo não pára e a vida também não.

A direction. The sunrise over the ocean. A leafy tree. A spontaneous smile. An open window to see the world turning. Not just see.
To participate. To contribute. To turn in the same direction. Because the world keeps turning and so does life.

domingo, 10 de agosto de 2008

The best idea I ever had

This is a text I wrote one year after I returned from Australia, in one of those occasions I felt the extreme need to communicate somehow. I read it again, 2 and half years later, and I still find myself in these words, even though some things have changed. I’m no longer melancholic nor do I feel empty anymore. I do miss the people I left behind, the places I lived in and the wonderful sensation of being a “free spirit”, with all the good and bad it brings. Many things happened since then but I still feel that going to Australia was the best thing I ever made, because it showed me, among other things, how to handle and live with myself.

9th March 2006. I’m sitting in front of the computer trying to put in words all the feelings that invade me. I listen to the voice of Paul Greene, the Australian singer that has been my company in the melancholic hours. Australia was an adventure that satisfied me in every sense and it was a place where I really felt at home.
It’s been a year today that I returned to Portugal, to the world I have always known and that I trade for another one, a distant one. I feel melancholic, as in many other days since I returned. In the first months, I felt the need to touch in things I brought from Australia, to see the faces of the people, to remind myself of what I have done there. The sensation of emptiness still haunts me, because the memories hide in my brain and I desperately try to bring them back to the surface. I know I won’t loose them, we don’t loose what we learn, but to come back to a different world like this I’m living now makes me diverge from what I found out to be in Australia: a bit hippie, a successful communicator, a liberated person and a free soul. An incorrigible dreamer with a huge willpower to change the world and the conviction I could really do it. I feel limited here, as if the wings have separated from the body when I returned to the nest. Here I tend to be more of what the others think I am, to be more normal. I haven’t been wearing the hippie pants Mary gave me for a long time, even being the ones I like the most. I look normal, but I feel very different. One thing is for sure: going to Australia was the best idea I ever had, and hopefully it won’t be the last. The world - and what we can learn from it - is just too big.

3 and half years have passed since I returned. The wings are growing again.










2 comentários:

  1. Sorvo as tuas palavras neste texto maravilhoso. Porquê? Porque me revejo nelas. Compreendo a sensação de "prisão" que ás vezes o dia a dia nos pode trazer. O mundo pequenino que o nosso mundo quotidiano pode ser. A vontade de não ficarmos por aqui.
    Mostra-te ao mundo Sandra!... como és, como te sentiste na Austrália, sem medos.
    Não tenho dúvidas que a tua vida vai ser feita de muitas, mas mesmo muitas, "melhores ideias que tu tiveste". Com cabeçadas pelo meio, e bem dolorosas de certo, porque a vida é mesmo assim, mas com muitas, mesmo muitas, razões para sorrir como nestas fotos!
    I, also, try to achieve that everyday... :)

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  2. A vida é feita de experiências diferentes, mas todas elas válidas, sejam boas ou más. Uma ideia só se torna a melhor que já tivemos se a pusermos em prática... é isso que custa mais, libertarmo-nos das "amarras" do conforto e da rotina do dia-a-dia, de tudo aquilo que conhecemos e tentar aquela ideia, sem saber se vai correr bem. Gosto desta liberdade que o improviso oferece e de lidar com a vida à medida que vai acontecendo. Ideias não faltam... e amigos que motivem também não. Obrigada por estares aqui :)

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